Banter at the scrum

Accylad


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Collectively there must be a wealth of funny comments/sledging heard by members around the scrum.

This from yesterday Hartpury College II v Exeter Uni II:

Hartpury 2 complains that Exeter 2 is set up on, not left of the mark. Exeter 2 "why don't you go back to your colouring in?"

Suppress a chuckle. Stand 'em up and reset.
 

woody


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Senior match.

THP: Sir, he's grabbing my fat roll and twisting.
LHP: Loose some f#$*ing weight.
THP: Don't call me fat.
LHP: I didn't, you said you're fat.
 

crossref


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At an U13 match where two hookers were bantering at line outs and scrums and it ws getting emotional and a flashpoint.

me - "right time off, you two, come here. OK, it was funny while it lasted, but enough banter now and we'll get on with the game, understood?"

red hooker - "yes sir"
blue hooker - "yes sir"
me - "OK, time on, line out red"
[red hooker throws in, not straight]
blue hooker - "nice throw, fatty!"

He just couldn't resist. I had to laugh even as i gave a PK against him.
 

Browner

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At an U13 match where two hookers were bantering at line outs and scrums and it ws getting emotional and a flashpoint.

me - "right time off, you two, come here. OK, it was funny while it lasted, but enough banter now and we'll get on with the game, understood?"

red hooker - "yes sir"
blue hooker - "yes sir"
me - "OK, time on, line out red"
[red hooker throws in, not straight]
blue hooker - "nice throw, fatty!"

He just couldn't resist. I had to laugh even as i gave a PK against him.

:eek:fftopic: a feable attempt to badge this as scrum banter CR :biggrin:
 

oldman


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When playing many years ago there was a little "chat" about the decision prior to one scrum. The referee commented that there appeared to be a lot of referees on the pitch today. Someone commented " aye and your not the pick of the bunch."
 

TheBFG


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Collectively there must be a wealth of funny comments/sledging heard by members around the scrum.

This from yesterday Hartpury College II v Exeter Uni II:

Hartpury 2 complains that Exeter 2 is set up on, not left of the mark. Exeter 2 "why don't you go back to your colouring in?"

Suppress a chuckle. Stand 'em up and reset.

Which is why I still stick with mark across the pitch, there can be no issue as to who's on the right side of it then! College game too, watching too much TV, tell um to GTF on with it!!!!!!!! :mad:
 

Lee Lifeson-Peart


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Gentlemen

I recall a match from a couple of years ago when I awarded a PK at a scrum about 22m out, bang in front, against the defending team. As the the collapsed scrum stood up the defending Hooker and Captain called me a "phooking cheat". Oh how we all laughed!

Yours faithfully

Mr W Barnes, Gloucestershire

:biggrin:
 
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Adam


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When playing many years ago there was a little "chat" about the decision prior to one scrum. The referee commented that there appeared to be a lot of referees on the pitch today. Someone commented " aye and your not the pick of the bunch."

I heard tell of a high level referee who used the following:

"I wasn't aware there was more than one referee on the pitch today. *Pause 1,2,3,4,5,6* And if I had to pick one, I wouldn't have chosen you."
 

Accylad


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:eek:fftopic:
Which is why I still stick with mark across the pitch, there can be no issue as to who's on the right side of it then!

If the mark is across the pitch how do you get them to go left of it?
 

didds

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this was so long ago I was a student! we were on tour in IIRC Crawley, all the way from UCW Abersytwyth.

One scrum, the ref was being ultra pernickity - two inches left red, an inch right blue. This while the packs were engaged. We were sweating cobs in the front row on a warm Easter Sunday afternoon. This went on for an age.

Our TH pipes up "Shall we have a cup of tea ref".

PK against...

And I once used that anecdote in a club dinner speech in praise of referees - this was an example of their excellent sense of humour ;-)


didds
 
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Fatboy_Ginge


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In my playing days as a TH I used to prop my best mate at hooker, we'd played together for years so had an excellent understanding. He was a very good technical hooker and used to take LOTS of ball against the head, even on a lot of times when it was a crooked feed. His dad ALWAYS came to watch him and used to talk to the opposition spectators to get information about the teams we were playing. Some of it useful, mostly not. On this occasion it was. He overheard two alickadoos discussing the opposition hooker saying that having been dropped from the firsts he was out to make a point, he came running over to us to let us know this little tidbit.

At the first scrum my mate looked at me with a view to pincering the hooker. so we duly did... The ball came in, my mate had a flash and nearly took the ball against the head; he then piped up "F**K me... No wonder you were dropped." The other hooker stood up and started throwing punches, all of which missed. The ref blew up, started lecturing us and asked what had kicked it off, The opposition LH said, nodding in the direction of my friend, "He said, F**k me no wonder you were dropped, having seen him hooking I agree. He's gonna be lucky to be playing in the thirds next week".

Once the ref had stopped laughing he reset the scrum and told us not to be children.
 

SimonSmith


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An oft told tale.

captain was the hooker, and he was doing a grand job. His tight head, who was, to put it charitably, a lumbering oaf, less so.

And I'd reached frustration point. After the THP offered up yet another piece of advice, the captain jumped in ahead of me.
"If you don't want to go off for blood, shut the hell up"
"But I'm not bleeding"
"you will be after I've bleeding hit you"
"ref, can he say that?"
"Didn't hear a thing"
 

Guyseep


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This is one of my favourite replies when players get a bit chatty - "There's a reason I am wearing this ref's jersey, and it's not because I look good in orange."
 

talbazar


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This is one of my favourite replies when players get a bit chatty - "There's a reason I am wearing this ref's jersey, and it's not because I look good in orange."
Player: "Is it because you're too bad/fat/skinny/dumb/blind(*) to play sir?"

(*) Use the most appropriate one :booty:


Yesterday's game, Red scrum goes back a good 10 metres. At next scrum, Red hooker (who used to ref some years back):
Red 2: What happen on last scrum sir?
Ref: Nothing illegal... I could answer, but...
Red 2: We got F*%ked, huh?
Ref: --nod with a sorry grin--
 
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