So, after passing my ELRA two seasons back, I finally got round to actually reffing my first game today. A level 11 adult game - a couple of ‘seconds’ teams - but still a league match, so the result was (I presume) important. And, to be honest, by the end of the game I felt truly awful.
What follows now is a write up of today’s experience. This is firstly for me to write it down so I have something to reflect on, but secondly to allow some of the more experienced refs, if they are patient enough to read this, to give me some honest, but also constructive criticism and advice to help me move forward.
A quick overview of me: 43 years old, ex junior football referee (few years), and never really played rugby since leaving school. I got ‘into’ rugby 2 years ago when my son, who is pretty good, started playing. To help support him, and his team/club, I decided to take the ELRA. With my local society short of refs at the moment, I was encouraged to actually start reffing, and got assigned my first game today.
I was pretty nervous going into this. I’d been going through the rule book as much as I could, and felt confident that I knew a good majority of the laws. For reasons unknown, I was woken at 3am last night with cramp in both calves. Not sure if it was stress related, but they were still aching when I got to the ground today.
I arrived at the ground an hour before the kickoff, with my son who came to watch. Was a little nervous, but not too bad at that point, got changed and did a pitch inspection. All well and good so far. Half an hour before the game I went to each team, did a boot inspection (found a missing stud which I got them to fix), and did a team talk with FR (+replacements) & the captains. I was a little stuttery here, but covered what I wanted to, ensuring the CTPA, and agreed with both captains rolling subs. All still good, and I was feeling reasonable.
Quarter to three, I go through a small warm-up routine, stretching muscles and doing some short runs.
Three o’clock came, I did the toss up, and ensured both teams were ready. I then blew my whistle to start the game, the kick was made, and I went completely blank. Utter rabbit in headlight moment.
It probably took three minutes before I was able to actually referee to any level at all! By then I believe I missed a number of offenses, which the players were only to keen to point out. I attempted to brush this off and then tried to do what I could. I’d also realised that I hadn’t started either stopwatch, so ended up just using the actual time to work out when the half would finish!
From then on, I believe I was equitable. I was equally poor to both sides!
I was, apparently, missing quite a few offences in the mauls/rucks. My positioning at that point wasn’t that bad (I don’t think), but in reflection, I wasn’t exactly sure what I was seeing half the time. Just a mass of bodies. I know the laws about handling in rucks, and being on your feet to get involved, coming in from the back, but it didn’t help. To be honest, I think I was just swamped with the amount of things that I was supposed to be looking at, that I didn’t really look at anything properly. I was also missing a few people creeping in from the sides. Apparently there was a lot of players on the floor pulling people down, and people not being released.
Here then came a problem, which I caused, then compounded, which became a vicious circle.
I missed things. I knew that, and the players knew that. Some of the players, from both sides, were being a little vocal about it, and the captains were passing some feedback/queries to me, questioning laws etc that I had missed. I know, in reflection, I should have done more at that point to stamp it out. However, I felt so guilty for missing things, and I felt they were almost justified to complain. I felt it would have been worse if I missed an offence by black, then penalised red for complaining about me missing it. In a way I felt I had caused the problem, so they weren’t in the wrong. However, their comments compounded my issues as I became more and more aware of the fact that I wasn’t quite up to it, which made me feel more and more incompetent. So a downward slope crept in.
Both teams were guilty of dissent. Not the entirety of each team, at least I didn’t hear it from all of the players, but I’d say both were equally bad. Both captains questioned many instances, decisions (or lack of them): what is ‘normal’ comments/feedback from captains? I don’t even know what I should expect from them!
I continued on, trying to do my best, keeping up with play reasonable well, but I allowed the murmurs of dissent to continue. Then, halfway through the first half, I pulled my left calf muscle. Not bad enough to go off, but it slowed me down, and I was limping at times. The pain from this was a distraction I didn’t need as I knew I was already struggling.
In hindsight, the teams could have cut me a little slack, and given me more chance to actually referee instead of complaining all the time, but I am also aware that they did have something ‘real’ to complain about.
It continued on until about 5 minutes before half time, when I’d had enough of the dissent, and was feeling pretty damn miserable. I didn’t want to be on the pitch any more. I called both captains to me, and explained my situation: That it was my first game, I knew I’d made mistakes and I was sorry, but I was doing my best to give them a game of rugby. They appeared to accept this, and both then got their teams into a huddle to try and calm things. The rest of the first half went without major incident.
The second half was pretty similar to the first. I missed a few things, was accused of missing more (I’m aware that they will try to claim things that weren’t real). About 10 minutes in, my right calf goes, and I’m even slower at getting to places, but soldiered on and never ended up too far away from things.
I felt, quite often at the breakdowns, that I was ‘in the way’, so I think my positioning was not as good as it should have been. I was on the side that the ball was going to come out, to try and get a head start to keep with play, but often found myself in the way of a pass and players telling me to move, or nudging me out of the way.
Scrums, I think went pretty well, and I didn’t get any negative comments back from the players. A few calls of ‘not straight sir’, but for the most part, they went well. No collapses, forced ups, offsides, and only one re-set for coming together way too early.
I believe I made two major mistakes, which both allowed a score that shouldn’t have stood, one for each side (one apparently went into touch just before the score, the other apparently had a knock on before the score) However, I’d made my calls, so couldn’t go back on them. However, even that ended equitable I guess, as it equalled out with both sides profiting from them. (not intentional balance though!)
There was a little handbags towards the end of the second half, but I stopped it quick, and it appeared to dissipate.
For the most part, I think I was able to keep on top of the ‘law’ aspect of the game. (if I ignore the fact I missed jumping early in a lineout). When I actually saw something, I knew what to do next. I had one point when I was going to give a scrum for a missed drop goal, but did change that to a 22 dropout on the insistence of players. That was a mistake too I guess in hindsight. I also had one time when I stopped the game at a breakdown, there was a little skirmish that then happened, then when we got back to the game, I’d completely forgotten what I’d stopped the game and needed the players to remind me!
The game ended at a close 31-29, and when it did I was so relieved to get off the pitch and into the changing rooms. I was happy that I’d actually finished the game though; what with the two calf injuries, and all the dissent I’d suffered, and the amount of things I knew I’d missed, there was a couple of points in the game where I just wanted to walk away and go home, never looking back.
I hobbled upstairs to the bar after the game, wondering what to expect, but people actually spoke to me, and were polite about it! Apparently I wasn’t the worst ref they’d had this season, which may not say much for the other one! I was given some ‘pointers’, saying to concentrate more on knock-ons and offsides more in my next game, as they were more important to the game. But this was from an ex-player/spectator so not sure of the advice. Both coaches were very polite and pleasant, which eased some of my worries.
What I took away from this ‘experience’:
My positioning needs
Whilst I’m aware of some of the issues, there are probably more. A big problem I have is knowing ‘how’ to deal with them though, to ensure that I’ve improved. Not really many resources of places to get ref ‘training’.
A bigger problem will be getting up the courage to go through all this again though. I really don’t want to feel ‘beaten’ though, and hate the idea that I may have ‘failed’, so I will ref again if I can get to the point where I feel that I’ve actually improved on a number of areas.
Today wasn’t pleasant. Some of it was caused by the two teams, and their handling of a first time referee, but by no means all. I know I was poor, and I hated it. I didn’t expect to flounder quite that much, despite it being my first game and my zero experience as a player. I am quite self-critical, to a fault, and everything compounded together today to something that I really don’t want to experience again.
Update: I have just received a voice-mail (damn phone signal) call from the chairman of the home side’s club. He has apologised, profusely, for the behaviour of his side’s treatment of me. Not sure how he’d heard about it (he wasn’t at the game), but he was appalled by their actions. At this point I found out exactly how wound up I’ve been about it all, as I broke down in tears at hearing his words. I don’t think I’ve ever reacted like that to non-life-critical things!
What follows now is a write up of today’s experience. This is firstly for me to write it down so I have something to reflect on, but secondly to allow some of the more experienced refs, if they are patient enough to read this, to give me some honest, but also constructive criticism and advice to help me move forward.
A quick overview of me: 43 years old, ex junior football referee (few years), and never really played rugby since leaving school. I got ‘into’ rugby 2 years ago when my son, who is pretty good, started playing. To help support him, and his team/club, I decided to take the ELRA. With my local society short of refs at the moment, I was encouraged to actually start reffing, and got assigned my first game today.
I was pretty nervous going into this. I’d been going through the rule book as much as I could, and felt confident that I knew a good majority of the laws. For reasons unknown, I was woken at 3am last night with cramp in both calves. Not sure if it was stress related, but they were still aching when I got to the ground today.
I arrived at the ground an hour before the kickoff, with my son who came to watch. Was a little nervous, but not too bad at that point, got changed and did a pitch inspection. All well and good so far. Half an hour before the game I went to each team, did a boot inspection (found a missing stud which I got them to fix), and did a team talk with FR (+replacements) & the captains. I was a little stuttery here, but covered what I wanted to, ensuring the CTPA, and agreed with both captains rolling subs. All still good, and I was feeling reasonable.
Quarter to three, I go through a small warm-up routine, stretching muscles and doing some short runs.
Three o’clock came, I did the toss up, and ensured both teams were ready. I then blew my whistle to start the game, the kick was made, and I went completely blank. Utter rabbit in headlight moment.
It probably took three minutes before I was able to actually referee to any level at all! By then I believe I missed a number of offenses, which the players were only to keen to point out. I attempted to brush this off and then tried to do what I could. I’d also realised that I hadn’t started either stopwatch, so ended up just using the actual time to work out when the half would finish!
From then on, I believe I was equitable. I was equally poor to both sides!
I was, apparently, missing quite a few offences in the mauls/rucks. My positioning at that point wasn’t that bad (I don’t think), but in reflection, I wasn’t exactly sure what I was seeing half the time. Just a mass of bodies. I know the laws about handling in rucks, and being on your feet to get involved, coming in from the back, but it didn’t help. To be honest, I think I was just swamped with the amount of things that I was supposed to be looking at, that I didn’t really look at anything properly. I was also missing a few people creeping in from the sides. Apparently there was a lot of players on the floor pulling people down, and people not being released.
Here then came a problem, which I caused, then compounded, which became a vicious circle.
I missed things. I knew that, and the players knew that. Some of the players, from both sides, were being a little vocal about it, and the captains were passing some feedback/queries to me, questioning laws etc that I had missed. I know, in reflection, I should have done more at that point to stamp it out. However, I felt so guilty for missing things, and I felt they were almost justified to complain. I felt it would have been worse if I missed an offence by black, then penalised red for complaining about me missing it. In a way I felt I had caused the problem, so they weren’t in the wrong. However, their comments compounded my issues as I became more and more aware of the fact that I wasn’t quite up to it, which made me feel more and more incompetent. So a downward slope crept in.
Both teams were guilty of dissent. Not the entirety of each team, at least I didn’t hear it from all of the players, but I’d say both were equally bad. Both captains questioned many instances, decisions (or lack of them): what is ‘normal’ comments/feedback from captains? I don’t even know what I should expect from them!
I continued on, trying to do my best, keeping up with play reasonable well, but I allowed the murmurs of dissent to continue. Then, halfway through the first half, I pulled my left calf muscle. Not bad enough to go off, but it slowed me down, and I was limping at times. The pain from this was a distraction I didn’t need as I knew I was already struggling.
In hindsight, the teams could have cut me a little slack, and given me more chance to actually referee instead of complaining all the time, but I am also aware that they did have something ‘real’ to complain about.
It continued on until about 5 minutes before half time, when I’d had enough of the dissent, and was feeling pretty damn miserable. I didn’t want to be on the pitch any more. I called both captains to me, and explained my situation: That it was my first game, I knew I’d made mistakes and I was sorry, but I was doing my best to give them a game of rugby. They appeared to accept this, and both then got their teams into a huddle to try and calm things. The rest of the first half went without major incident.
The second half was pretty similar to the first. I missed a few things, was accused of missing more (I’m aware that they will try to claim things that weren’t real). About 10 minutes in, my right calf goes, and I’m even slower at getting to places, but soldiered on and never ended up too far away from things.
I felt, quite often at the breakdowns, that I was ‘in the way’, so I think my positioning was not as good as it should have been. I was on the side that the ball was going to come out, to try and get a head start to keep with play, but often found myself in the way of a pass and players telling me to move, or nudging me out of the way.
Scrums, I think went pretty well, and I didn’t get any negative comments back from the players. A few calls of ‘not straight sir’, but for the most part, they went well. No collapses, forced ups, offsides, and only one re-set for coming together way too early.
I believe I made two major mistakes, which both allowed a score that shouldn’t have stood, one for each side (one apparently went into touch just before the score, the other apparently had a knock on before the score) However, I’d made my calls, so couldn’t go back on them. However, even that ended equitable I guess, as it equalled out with both sides profiting from them. (not intentional balance though!)
There was a little handbags towards the end of the second half, but I stopped it quick, and it appeared to dissipate.
For the most part, I think I was able to keep on top of the ‘law’ aspect of the game. (if I ignore the fact I missed jumping early in a lineout). When I actually saw something, I knew what to do next. I had one point when I was going to give a scrum for a missed drop goal, but did change that to a 22 dropout on the insistence of players. That was a mistake too I guess in hindsight. I also had one time when I stopped the game at a breakdown, there was a little skirmish that then happened, then when we got back to the game, I’d completely forgotten what I’d stopped the game and needed the players to remind me!
The game ended at a close 31-29, and when it did I was so relieved to get off the pitch and into the changing rooms. I was happy that I’d actually finished the game though; what with the two calf injuries, and all the dissent I’d suffered, and the amount of things I knew I’d missed, there was a couple of points in the game where I just wanted to walk away and go home, never looking back.
I hobbled upstairs to the bar after the game, wondering what to expect, but people actually spoke to me, and were polite about it! Apparently I wasn’t the worst ref they’d had this season, which may not say much for the other one! I was given some ‘pointers’, saying to concentrate more on knock-ons and offsides more in my next game, as they were more important to the game. But this was from an ex-player/spectator so not sure of the advice. Both coaches were very polite and pleasant, which eased some of my worries.
What I took away from this ‘experience’:
My positioning needs
- Work to get out of the way or the play & players, but still allowing me to keep up.
- I need to work on sprint training to try and build up calves. I usually do distance running in the gym, so I think this should change to try and prevent calf pulls.
- Somehow, I need to take control of the game, and be more confident with what I’m doing, to help the players respect my decisions, even if they are wrong. I guess this comes with experience/time.
- I need to stamp on dissent somehow (even if I feel guilty about doing it!) to stop it bringing me, and the game down, and stop it spreading. This won’t be easy, as I feel inferior to them with my lack of rugby experience.
- Somehow I need to learn exactly what to look for in breakdowns, so I can actually see all of the offences.
- I need to be more vocal. In my nervous state, I was signalling advantage, but rarely calling it. (I did call when advantage over). I didn’t call most mauls/rucks. I didn’t really get any (good) communication going with the teams. (I think the dissent and my poor performance contributed to that).
Whilst I’m aware of some of the issues, there are probably more. A big problem I have is knowing ‘how’ to deal with them though, to ensure that I’ve improved. Not really many resources of places to get ref ‘training’.
A bigger problem will be getting up the courage to go through all this again though. I really don’t want to feel ‘beaten’ though, and hate the idea that I may have ‘failed’, so I will ref again if I can get to the point where I feel that I’ve actually improved on a number of areas.
Today wasn’t pleasant. Some of it was caused by the two teams, and their handling of a first time referee, but by no means all. I know I was poor, and I hated it. I didn’t expect to flounder quite that much, despite it being my first game and my zero experience as a player. I am quite self-critical, to a fault, and everything compounded together today to something that I really don’t want to experience again.
Update: I have just received a voice-mail (damn phone signal) call from the chairman of the home side’s club. He has apologised, profusely, for the behaviour of his side’s treatment of me. Not sure how he’d heard about it (he wasn’t at the game), but he was appalled by their actions. At this point I found out exactly how wound up I’ve been about it all, as I broke down in tears at hearing his words. I don’t think I’ve ever reacted like that to non-life-critical things!